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I'm Every Woman
Saturday, Nov. 13, 2004 at 1:14 PM


I wrote a fantastic entry last week about my first trip to a strip club, a bad date with someone I met on OKCupid and the retail therapy I did at Somerset Mall in order to reward myself for getting through it.

But, I didn't clipboard it and my internet connection died as soon as I hit the submit button. Ah, well.

I'm done with OKCupid, by the way. I'm busy and my priorities have changed a bit since I decided that "casual dating" was enough for me. I'm back to where I started, having spent enough time to get over my last relationship and been on enough dates to get my confidence back.

Oh, and that first entry that I just linked to, the one that I was seriously considering deleting so that even my close friends wouldn't see how pathetic and needy I was being? Guess who decided to check my diary that day. I got a real sick thrill out of it though, since I've been guilty of checking his livejournal and gaining information that I really didn't want. Now we're even, since he was already feeling guilty as hell over jerking me around without knowing that I was actually in love with him.

I think that last, self-pitying night was the last hurrah. When I think about him it no longer has anything to do with me, and when I think about men and dating in general it's no longer a top goal of mine. I'm really enjoying school and forming close friendships with people that I didn't see very often until now, and that's what's important to me right now. I'm having a lot of fun dressing up every day. (My retail therapy included finding a cashmere/silk blend tank top in a color I've been trying to introduce into my wardrobe, a light teal, from Bebe for $13.24!!!) Me, Kelly and her brother Jason went to see Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason last night and aside from a few stabs of jealousy that she had three insanely attracted people pining after her, I had fun. She is a fictional character, after all, and one that's designed to be vindicating for all the women who don't feel like they measure up which, after all, is all of us!

I'm back to the point where just me is enough, and that gives me the freedom to wait for what I really want.

And a shitty date with someone I have nothing in common with, or even a good date with someone who I have things in common with but don't know from a hole in the wall, is not it.


I'm listening to a mix of sultry, female singers that I made
I'm reading Men, Women, and Chainsaws: Gender in the Modern Horror Film by Carol J. Clover, and I'm almost done!
I want to get over my cold

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